It took me a while to write this entry because I wanted to make sure I wasn’t writing from a place of anger or indignation. I wanted my state of mind to be fair because I don’t want to get into a fight, but I do want to make sure they do the right thing.

A couple of weeks ago, Elon was once again rushed to the ER due to an anaphylactic attack. His first experience helped me put my research and preparedness to work, and while I always prayed that we would never have to deal with it in real life, I’m also glad that we knew what to do when it happened.

This second time, it was just me and E. His dad had work and a dinner, so I planned a nice day for just the two of us, which included dinner at Conti’s. I’m not going to say which branch it was, since I’m sure they share the same recipes anyway, and this is something that every single branch needs to act upon. I ordered the smoked BBQ ribs for E, since he has had barbecue a trillion times before. Barbecue is generally one of the safest foods for him. I asked if it contained peanuts or dairy of any form, and informed them of his allergy. I was reassured that it contained none of those things, and I was satisfied.

An hour or so later, we got home and started preparing for bed. In the shower, E started to cough. I thought he accidentally swallowed water from the shower, and didn’t think more of it. Then he started to complain that he was feeling itchy. I got him out of the shower, wiped him down, and got ready to put some lotion on him, when I saw it.

Hives were crawling up his torso, and he started coughing more. I instantly went into Hyper Aware Mom mode and pressed my ear against his chest: there was wheezing. His nose was beginning to run. And I knew it instantly- this was another severe allergic reaction.

I swallowed my panic and dressed him as quickly as I could and called my dad, who was only ten minutes away, to come and pick us up. Niki was all the way in BGC and was too far away. I monitored his progress and my dad’s ETA, and I felt we had enough time to rush to the nearest ER.

I carried him down stairs and waited outside our house for my dad to arrive, and when he did, we drove as quickly as we could to the nearest hospital, just another 10 minutes away. On the way there, I called Conti’s just to re-confirm the ingredients in their smoked barbecue ribs – Are you sure, I asked, that it doesn’t have any form of peanut? No oil or sauce of any kind? No ma’am, they said, there’s no peanuts in there at all. The person on the phone even asked the cook, and she said they were sure.

By the time we got there, his hives were already all over his body:

E fell asleep while recovering, probably due to all the meds in his system, and Niki arrived soon after. We were trying to figure out what could have triggered this episode. I told him about our dinner at Conti’s, and that’s when we figured it out.  When E had his first attack, Niki and E also had dinner there and had the exact same meal, after being reassured that there were no peanuts in the dish. I was not with them when they ate there, and so did not make the connection immediately. But that night it was confirmed. Everything turned out fine, and after a few hours we were discharged.

After a couple of weeks, Niki finally made his way to Conti’s to confront them regarding that damn dish. He asked to speak to the Officer-in-Charge, and the moment he asked about the ingredients, the OIC immediately said that it contained peanut butter.

PEANUT BUTTER. PEANUT. BUTTER. PEANUT. FREAKING. BUTTER. I’m glad I wasn’t there, because just thinking about all the reassurances we got makes me want to throw a bowl against the wall and then cry out of frustration.

Niki told them about E’s allergy, how we had to rush him to the ER twice because of their ignorance, and how his allergy is a DEADLY allergy. His throat was closing and his lungs were shutting down. This wasn’t an allergy that made him sneeze, it was one that could kill him. And the least that the servers could have done was quadruple check with management regarding the ingredients after we told them about the extreme effects of this ingredient. He also told them to put an allergy warning on the menu and to list down ALL known common allergens that are in their food. It’s not hard. Just say, hey this food has peanut butter, or soy, or pine nuts, or milk. You might be allergic to it, watch out! And to also train their servers to be aware of these things, and to say “I cannot be sure if this ingredient is in there or not” if they do not know. I would have gladly ordered something else, or eaten elsewhere, if they were honest enough that they couldn’t be sure. No harm done. I understand that some establishments cannot accommodate his allergy, so we go elsewhere.

So this is all I’m asking: PLEASE TRAIN YOUR STAFF. PLEASE INDICATE IN THE MENU IF THE FOOD CONTAINS COMMON ALLERGENS. PLEASE SAY “I DON’T KNOW” IF YOU DON’T KNOW.

I’m aware that severe allergies like what E has are not as common in this country, most food establishments are still pretty lacking in their knowledge. But NOW you know, and you are aware, so please, PLEASE, don’t be careless.

We were fortunate that we live so near many medical establishments, and that I knew what steps to take. What if the next customer was unaware of their child’s allergy? What if they didn’t know it was going to have this effect? What if they didn’t know what anaphylaxis was? So, please, for the love of breathing, edit your menus. Put an allergy warning, or at the very, very, very least, make sure your staff knows what’s in your own food. It could save a life.