Sometimes, the mental load is just overwhelming. On the outside, most moms look like they’ve got everything covered and figured out. Chances are, her brain is constantly moving between the one million small things that need to be done in between the 50 big things on her list for the day. Sure, it all seems simple enough. Cook, clean, pay bills, keep child alive, get some writing done, choreograph a song.

But what isn’t accounted for are the small details– trash, schedule this appointment, wash the child’s butt cause he needed to poop just as you were about to head out, make sure you eat food that isn’t crap, drink your meds, oh that reminds me the little guy needs his vitamins too but why can’t I find the bottle anywhere? Pick up the laundry when you drop off some dry cleaning, whoops you’re running out of towels, make sure you don’t leave those. Pick up this, go to that, meet this person, send out these emails, check these songs for the show, ask this person something.

Then you also have to deal with people along the way, people who won’t cooperate, people who have attitude, people who won’t reply. Nothing is ever really set in stone, and you have to be able to shift your expectations and schedules as the day goes by. Not to mention you are also raising a child, so while this is going on, you are disciplining, loving, hugging, wiping tears, saying “good job” after they’ve done the same stupid jump for the 100th time in a row.

It’s overwhelming, and I wish people understood it better, the mental load that so many mothers and homemakers carry. A lot of the anxiety and stress also comes from the expectation that people seem to have of us- that we’re supposed to get it right the first time, and every time. That we’re supposed to just do it all, have it all, and have perfect eyebrows while we’re at it. That reminds me, I haven’t plucked my eyebrows in a month. And my legs need shaving. Oh crap it’s also been 3 days since i’ve washed my hair! Must not forget to lather up today.

Actually, screw everyone else. I don’t expect people outside of my (incredibly tiny) circle of trust to really understand, that’s unfair of me to ask. But partners – you gotta be in stride with your wives. You have to know how her day is going, and please don’t be mad if she doesn’t remember to ask you about yours. Sometimes, it’s just too exhausting to remember even one more detail.

I have no point, I think. Except that today is a particularly edgy day and it’s one of those tough ones that make you just want to research on how to migrate to Australia. I also hear Canada has AMAZING healthcare and maternity benefits! Think they could use another pregnant pole fitness teacher there?

You know what, I do have a point. This is just me displaying what the beginning of a mental breakdown looks like and I want to let all moms know that HI WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER! I mean, apart, but together. I can’t invite you over just yet, i’m too lazy to vacuum. But also, know that it’s okay to fall apart every once in a while, no eyebrow grooming needed.